SAY NO MORE – train surfing

[Melbourne train operator Metro has condemned the “reckless and extremely dangerous” practice of “coupler riding” – where people ride on the outside of a train.]

The grieving mother of a teenager who was surfing on train roofs.

Oh my son is a good boy. He would never get on top of a train carriage.
But madam we checked the dead boys DNA and it matches your son.
There must be some sort of mistake my boy is such a good boy.
Why then was he on the roof of the travelling train?
But my boy was doing his homework last night.
Why was he on top of the train?
He must have been kidnapped.
Surely not. We have video footage showing your son on the train roof.
Did you have signs on the roof saying no one is to ride on the train roof?
No madam.
Then I am going to sue the railways for not having warning signs up warning people not to get on the train roofs.
Madam you are not serious are you.
I am being very serious. It’s the railway’s fault. I am going to sue for millions. My boy was obviously kidnapped by railways staff and put on the train roof against his will. My boy is such a good boy.
Madam we have done tests on the boy and we have found traces of illegal drugs in his body system.
My boy doesn’t even know about illegal drugs, he’s a good boy. My boy, my boy.
But the drugs madam.
There has to be a mistake my boy would never take illegal drugs. Last night he said he had homework to do.
Your boy is dead madam.

Yours Sincerely; Lester John Murray.


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