The Guru – of fortune [he tells it and he gets it]

Isn’t this exciting Mavis.

Sure is.

Where do we register?

What a long form to fill in?

Gloria over here.

Any problems madam?

No.

Here’s a pen. Please be quick the queue is long.

Gloria they want to know our bank account number; why is that?

Beats me Mavis.

Excuse me sir why are our bank details needed?

A minor detail. That is incase you want to buy books and DVDs then we deduct the costs straight from your bank.

I did not know that you could do that.

Look I am just a staff member I just do what I am told. Please fill in the form and take a seat. Oh and yes that will be $50 each.

Thank you your seat numbers are on the tickets. Move along please.

Mavis this is so exciting a real live Guru. Look we are right at the front. It’s starting.

Ladies and gentleman the man we have waited so long for the Guru of Guru’s Guru Meta.

[Audience claps their hands]

Thank you ladies and gentleman it is a privilege to be able to be here tonight with you all. Now I am going to go in to a trance. Arrrrrrr ummmmmm. I sense a lady in the audience she’s about 34 years old she has fair hair. She has just had an operation. I can tell her she will recover completely. Please who is that? Show your hand please. Thank you madam. Was I correct?

You were Guru Meta. I am 34 and I had an operation yesterday on my hip.

Now who has read my latest book ‘Sand Is Hard to hold’?

Oh you all have. I refer you to chapter 5 titled ‘sand and rock’.

[The Guru entertains and teaches the audience for 2 hours]

Hey Gloria wake up you must have nodded of.

Oh sorry Mavis. Is it finished?

Yep come on everyone’s leaving. Come on we will take the short cut to the car through the mall.

[In the mall]

You are doomed! You are all doomed!

Excuse me you are blocking our path.

You are doomed the world is doomed.

Get out of the way or I will call the police.

Hello can I help.

Yes please tell this man to let us through.

Ok fellow you heard the lady move out of the way.

Oh sir we are most grateful let us buy you a drink.

Ok I accept the offer there’s a cafe on the corner over there.

[In the cafe the 3 of them are sitting down]

Some people can be so boorish.

You mean the doom man.

Yes of course.

Oh he’s harmless it’s the ones that propagate violence that rile me up.

Do you know the doom man?

Not personally but I see him often.

Oh you live around here.

Yes I do.

Don’t you find him offensive?

As I said he’s harmless.

Doom what doom? We have just come from very nice teaching at the Hallton Hotel. Have you heard of Guru Meta?

Yes I have.

Oh his teaching is wonderful. Such a wise man. He professed all good things for this planet.

Good things that is hard to take.

Why not good things?

For one thing there is an asteroid on a maybe collision path with this earth in about 29 years time.

All maybes.

The planet is wasting away in pollution. We are like one garbage heap. Pollution everywhere.

Talk for yourself.

What do you think?

Me.

Yes you are not saying much.

Oh I loved the Guru. Yes that man was amazing.

[Actually Gloria had not followed much of the Guru’s teaching she had nodded of]

I will tell you something. Pollution is just not of a physical nature there is so much spiritual pollution in this world now.

Ok ok you are not one of these ‘the world is at an end’.

Hey I know not the future. We can only try and know the future from looking at creation. Even then it is beyond us. Not even those who profess to be wise know the future. Jesus Christ himself admits he does not know when the end is. He says only the Father God knows when it is the end.

Hey we must go; nice talking to you.

Thank you.

You scared me about the asteroid.

Long way yet.

We like to be optimists.

Optimism was on the cross at Golgotha outside Jerusalem. The bloodied body of Jesus Christ dying on the cross. There’s optimism for you.

Come on Gloria we must go; bye.

Bye.

Prophets prophecy doom. They warn of God’s punishment. God punishes because He loves. A son or daughter may sin much; God forgives much. God is full of forgiveness. But God punishes for the good of the children. True; Jesus took our punishment. Those He took it for are spared the rod. The disciples of Jesus look to the cross. But all other people in the world need to be corrected. The rod can save it can bring life. People have a choice. Death or life?

Prophets do not always prophesy good. But they can and do. Prophets can be uplifting to people. Prophets are sent by God to bring good tidings and bad tidings. We get the prophets of doom and the prophets of uplifting. There is life and growth in the prophets words as there can be death and doom in the prophets words.

Prophets seldom bring God’s message to people for the sake of making money. Those prophets [not all] who are rich from their prophet works are suspect. False prophets are people that are in to making lots of money. False prophets use their authority to get their sordid ways with other people.

P.S. God always has the last say; if He wants to make a prophet rich He can.   

Kind regards; Lester John Murray.

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